The Princess and the Weed
by Danaxiel
Summary: WARNING: WEIRD RELATIONSHIP AHEAD! "Ivysaur looked at his now-Pokemon girlfriend, knowing that their vines would be entwined forever." For Golfer and PitFTW's contest! I don't expect to win either.


**Hello there Golfer, PitFTW, MetaKnight4ever, and MahNati! Be prepared for a particularly odd relationship. The temporary shipping name for it is RoyaleIvyshipping. I hope you guys like it!**

**~Danaxiel**

* * *

_~February 13, 2010_

_I had found him. The one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. When I arrived to the mansion, I thought I would always be in love with my savior, Link. However, it all changed with the Brawl. I was always attracted to the…odd types._

_I spent the first two weeks of Brawl thinking about the angel that had caught my eye. His said his name was Pit. Pit…I loved everything about him. The majestic wings that that shed silvery-white feathers when he walked. I loved his bushy brown hair that bounced when he laughed. The way his innocent smile lit up his childlike face always made me smile. When I confessed my feelings for him, he shook his head sadly._

_Then there was the creature known as Lucario. Yes I know he's a Pokémon! The way his aura always calmed me was so… attractive. I would watch him for hours as he meditated, just staring as his moonlit, blue fur. His pushed me away when I told him I loved him._

_At last, my eyes fell upon the mysterious masked warrior. He called himself Meta Knight. I had stared into his luminous yellow eyes through the slits in his mask. His bat wings that most would be scared of entranced me to him. When I mustered up the courage to tell him what I really thought about him, he and Jigglypuff were already married…_

_Wow… I've had a lot of rejections. But, I've finally found the man, or beast, of my dreams. Valentine's Day is tomorrow. A true day of romance is the perfect time to talk to my love. I don't know what I'll do if he breaks my heart._

_Princess Zelda of Hyrule._

Zelda sighed and tore the page out of the notebook. She crumpled it up and tossed it into the wastebasket next to her desk.

"Why did you throw it away?" piped a low tone voice.

Zelda's heart skipped a beat as she forgot that Meta Knight was still in her room. The small knight had been helping her with her… relationship problems.

"Come now Zelda, I thought we were making a breakthrough."

A small wave of annoyance brushed through the princess. The masked warrior was here to help her, not be her therapist!

"Meta… I just don't know."

Meta Knight let out a raspy sigh before turning back to her. "We've worked with everything. You've tried being romantic, seductive, and even desperate! You have tried to forget him, ignore him, and hate him. Yet you fail at those too. The only other option I can think of is to translate your love to him."

"You know I can't do that," Zelda argued, "I'd be the laughing stock of the mansion."

Meta Knight shook his head, "Secret admirers never live happily if they cannot confess their feelings."

"_The evening Brawl is on in five minutes. None are required to attend except for Red and Wario. Red and Wario. That is all."_

Master Hand's voice clicked off of the loudspeaker.

"Oh! The evening brawl!" Zelda exclaimed, happy to be out of the conversation.

As the princess made her way out of the room, Meta Knight said to her, "Zelda, I cannot help you if you cannot help yourself."

"Alright, I'll tell him right after the Brawl." Zelda replied.

Meta Knight gave her a curt nod and walked to the trash can.

"I do have luminous eyes, don't I?" he chuckled to the princess.

***

"Red, Wario; take the stage!" Master Hand called.

The two opponents took the stage.

"You're going down Ash!" Wario called.

"It's Red you idiot!" the Pokémon trainer called back.

Wario let out a chuckle as they both disappeared into the simulator. The blue-gray platform grew into the familiar surroundings of the Bridge of Eldin.

**3…**

Wario reentered on his Wario Bike.

**2…**

Red hopped to the sidelines and let Charizard out onto the bridge.

**1…**

Zelda let out a disappointed sigh when Charizard come out.

**GO!**

Charizard made the first move. The orange dragon raced to meet the smelly man with a Rock Smash. Charizard pulled the chuck of rock out of the bridge and attempted to crack Wario with it.

"Not this time Lizard-boy!" Wario cried as he threw the newly spawned Smart Bomb at Charizard. The bomb ignited; catching both players in the blast.

"**That one backfired a little bit!" **Master Hand called out.

Charizard let out a raging Flamethrower on the biker and then followed up with a Fire Spin.

"**Wario is in trouble now!" **Crazy Hand announced.

"I'll show you trouble you oversized glove!" Wario hissed

As soon as the obese man hit the floor, he slammed his fist into Charizard's gut twice before attacking with Corkscrew. Charizard flew right and landed right into the Bulbin that was crossing the stage.

"Charizard!" Red cried as his Pokémon exploded off the stage.

"Meh heh!" Wario chuckled as he shook his buttocks in the crowd's direction.

Samus and Yoshi exchanged annoyed glances before they started chanting, "SQUIRTLE!!! SQUIRTLE!!!"

Wario spit on the floor as Squirtle popped onto the stage.

_When's he going to send out Ivysaur? _Zelda thought desperately as she turned away from the fight.

"Squirtle KO'd him." Meta Knight pointed out randomly.

Zelda quickly looked back on stage to see the distant shape of Wario flying off the stage.

"Go Ivysaur!" Red yelled as Squirtle was replaced by a familiar grass Pokémon.

Ivysaur shook himself as a taunt before Wario came back onto the stage.

"Come on Ivysaur!" Zelda blurted out, receiving strange glances from her companions.

Ivysaur looked at her as Wario rammed into the Pokémon with a Shoulder Bash.

"**Ooh! That had to hurt with only one stock left!" **Master Hand cried.

Ivysaur wasn't ready to give up yet. He grabbed the fat man and threw him above his head and rapidly followed with a Bullet Seed.

Wario jumped as soon as the Bullet Seed decreased in size. He then let out the dreaded Wario Waft.

The biker's butt exploded with toxic gas and sent the small Pokémon flying.

"**I don't' know how he survived that one!" **Master Hand exclaimed.

"**One more hit like that and he'll be dead as dolphin!" **Crazy Hand commented eagerly.

"**What?" **a confused Master Hand replied.

Ivysaur struggled to his feet and launched a Razor Leaf at Wario.

Instantly, a Smash Ball appeared.

"Come on Ivysaur!" Zelda cried out.

The Pokémon easily knocked Wario out of his path and crushed the Smash Ball with the sound of breaking glass.

Zelda stared into his normally red eyes as they took on a powerful yellow glare.

"Take that! Triple Finish!" Red called as his three Pokémon unleashed their most powerful moves.

"**It's super effective!" **Master Hand chuckled.

"**Effective like spreadable butter on circus waitress!" **Crazy Hand agreed with a smile.

Zelda didn't pay attention to the spectacular display of power. She just stared at Ivysaur. His lively red eyes reflected off the bright, artificial sun of the Bridge of Eldin. His blue-green skin, his bright pink bulb, the deadly, yet gorgeous, beam that erupted from his back. These things about the creature seemed so unique and beautiful. Wario blasted off the stage and Red recalled Squirtle and Charizard.

"**GAME!" **Master Hand cried as the Smashers began to dismiss themselves.

Zelda hurried into the hallway, anticipating Red's arrival.

It was a few minutes before the Pokémon Trainer entered the hallway.

"Hey Zelda." He said, passing her.

"Red," the Hylian woman said, "Can I speak to Ivysaur?"

Red stared at her in disbelief before slowly replying. "Okay…"

He popped open a Pokeball and let Ivysaur materialize out of it in a beam of red light.

The small creature blinked in confusion as Red let he and Zelda have some privacy.

"_Princess Zelda," _he started, _"How may I help you?"_

Zelda took a deep breath and began to talk in the Pokémon language.

"_Ivysaur, there is no need to address me as 'Princess.'"_

Ivysaur gave her a smile before speaking again, _"Alright, Zelda, did you need something?"_

"_I need you."_

"_Zelda…" _Ivysaur started, _"What does that mean?"_

"_You…I… I love y-you." _Zelda said letting out every one of her secrets, "_I love you so much! I've been admiring you from afar much too long!"_

Zelda quickly cupped her mouth, as if she couldn't control her actions.

The Pokémon gave her a bewildered stare.

"_Z-Zelda, I…love you too."_

The princess's heart skipped a beat.

"_But, we could never be together. I am sorry." _The Pokémon finished.

Zelda's happy heart shattered into a million pieces.

***

Behind the hallway, a figure happened to catch the whole scene. As the Pokémon left the crying woman in the hall, Bowser stepped out of the shadows.

"I think I have an answer to your… relationship predicament." The large koopa said.

***

"Are you sure this will work?" Zelda asked the koopa, observing her new body.

"If you can kiss your true love by the end of February 14th, the spell will be permanent." Bowser warned.

"Why February 14th?" Zelda asked curiously.

Bowser rolled his red eyes and said, "Obviously because it is a day of love tomorrow."

"How cliché." Zelda commented.

Bowser chuckled and said, "Go get him."

Before leaving, Zelda turned to Bowser and asked, "Why are you helping me?"

"I know better than anyone the difficulty of loving someone of a different species." Bowser replied solemnly.

***

_**The Next Day…**_

Ivysaur rubbed himself against his now Pokémon girlfriend. The beautiful Princess Zelda was a Pokémon. A pink Ivysaur with a golden Triforce on her forehead. He never thought this could ever happen but relationships are tricky that way.

"He looked at her. He stared into her eyes and knew that their vines would be entwined forever."

Link looked at the kids he was reading to.

"The End."

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**Not my best work, I know. I don't think I have a chance at winning this considering my computer has deleted this story 6 times. I had to settle for this story… I'm not making excuses for it though! I got the idea of an odd relationship across and that's what I was hoping for.**

**Until next time-**

**Danaxiel**


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